Trying to juggle his job at "Taste of Italy" along with writing papers for school and his graduation requirement to volunteer at the Golden Oaks Retirement Home, class clown Derrick uses humor to get the jobs done.
Eighth-grader Derrick wants to be a stand-up comedian, but his football coach, his parents, Joe, his boss at Taste of Italy, his English teacher Dowling the Dragon, and his Mr. Perfect older brother Craig don't think he's so funny. When Derrick discovers he needs a B on an English paper to stay eligible for football, how can he tame his smart mouth to stay out of trouble?
A 12-year-old boy and his frisky horse experience many humorous trials and tribulations. The horse, Joker, means well, but seems to cause non-stop trouble.
Pete finds that the strange noise he hears coming from the toilet is a pink alligator, who can change appearances at will into a mouse, spider, or a dog, is an alien from the planet Galunk.
After his dad leaves, Matt Delaney rebels and his erratic behavior lands him in the vice-principal's office. He is assigned a new class schedule which includes a cooking class. Matt is a rebel, not a joiner, and this could be a recipe for disaster.
Zack's dad drives him to his new middle school in the bug truck, and his new classmates tease him about his father's pest-control business. How can he handle the hassles?
When Steward Edmund Rounds and Sir Cumference notice that there are strangers camped nearby, Rounds II decides to investigate despite being involved with the task of learning how to make accurate counts of the castle's stores of food, supplies, and weaponry. When he reports back that an enemy is lying in wait, everyone moves quickly to defend the castle. But wait! Will Rounds II be able to figure out how many bows and arrows they have to create an appropriate battle plan? Using rounding techniques to figure out the totals more quickly, Rounds II is just in time to help stave off a potentially disastrous attack
City Birds is a witty, upbeat story about two falcon hatchlings named Stars and Stripes atop a skyscraper in Cleveland, Ohio. The two young birds are introduced to the life of a bird of prey in a big city. With their parents’ guidance, the young birds learn to catch pigeons (and not the “fowl” balls that come from the nearby baseball stadium), how to interact with humans (who are kind enough to feed the local pigeon “livestock”), and finally, how to fly, the final skill that will allow them to leave their concrete home to hunt for food and start their own homes and families. Told with tongue in cheek humor that will keep readers chuckling from cover to cover.
American artist Seymour Chwast reinterprets Hugh Lofting’s The Story of Doctor Dolittle for a 21st-century, graphic-novel-influenced audience, formatting the text in a comic style.
If you struggle to turn sticks into figures, then perhaps it is time to seek out a Trained Professional Artist! Illustrator Elwood H. Smith consults his expert funny bone as he leads budding artists through a tutorial on how to draw tricycle- riding pigs, silly-grinning cars, and jousting ketchup bottles. Emphasizing that subjects can be based on everyday materials and that artists have unique styles, this is a workbook that will encourage readers to experiment with their own types of visual expression.
He's beheld the butt and offered the scoop on poop. Now our more audible and odiferous body functions are given the Bennett treatment served up with a generous helping of zaniness. How hiccups, burps, and farts happen in humans and animals is explained and proclaimed via Seuss-ian-style rhyme and humor, fart-fully illustrated. What's another loud sound? Laughter!
How many months have 28 days? All of them! Young comedians will build vocabulary and learn fun homophone word play sharing Ridiculous Riddles with family and friends. Aligned to Common Core Standards and correlated to state standards.
Why did the music teacher need a ladder? To reach the high notes! Young comedians will build vocabulary and learn fun homophone word play sharing School Jokes with family and friends. Aligned to Common Core Standards and correlated to state standards.
What is served but never eaten? A tennis ball! Young comedians will build vocabulary and learn fun homophone word play sharing Sports Jokes with family and friends. Aligned to Common Core Standards and correlated to state standards.
What did 0 say to 8? Nice belt! Young comedians will build vocabulary and learn fun homophone word play sharing Really Silly Jokes with family and friends. Aligned to Common Core Standards and correlated to state standards.
What do monsters read in the newspaper? The horror-scope! Young comedians will build vocabulary and learn fun homophone word play sharing Monster Jokes with family and friends. Aligned to Common Core Standards and correlated to state standards.
Knock knock! Who’s there? Water! Water who? Water you waiting for? Buy this book! Young comedians will build vocabulary and learn fun homophone word play sharing knock knock jokes with family and friends. Aligned to Common Core Standards and correlated to state standards.
What do you call a crate of ducks? A box of quackers! Young comedians will build vocabulary and learn fun homophone word play sharing Animal Jokes with family and friends. Aligned to Common Core Standards and correlated to state standards.
What kind of dinosaur could jump higher than a house? All of them! A house can’t jump! Young comedians will build vocabulary and learn fun homophone word play sharing Dinosaur Jokes with family and friends. Aligned to Common Core Standards and correlated to state standards.
Rafferty's Rogues presents an exciting and entirely novel approach to a range of maths topics. This gang of lovable rogues have big, bad ideas but their limited knowledge of mathematics means every bold adventure ends in failure. The dumbest ambush ever gives the lowdown on time, time measures, day length, analogue, and digital recording, early clocks, calendars and diaries, and lots more.
Bunny is on a camping trip with his brother and his grandpa. How much trouble can he get into? As it turns out, a lot. For one thing, there are soldiers all over the place. Canada is about to go to war with the United States, and the battle starts tomorrow. Bunny is worried. A hockey rivalry is one thing, but this is serious. And why is everybody so happy? Things get personal when an American soldier steals his brother Spencer's cell phone. Bunny decides to track down the phone himself. Maybe they can get out of there before the war starts. That’s when things get confusing... In this zany prequel to Ink Me and The Wolf and Me, the hockey-loving, indomitable Bunny goes camping with his brother and his grandpa.
As the eve of the great Wizards' Summit approaches, wizards from all over Rockfall Mountain descend on the school at Shadow Tower to refine their craft. When professors start disappearing, it's up to magic-fearing monster sleuths Tank and Fizz to solve this spell-packed mystery and find the missing mages. Aleetha, their detective partner and a wizard-in-training, has dragged Tank and Fizz into the heart of the Shadow Tower, where libraries fly, spells fill the air, and an ancient army of darkness stirs, when she receives a mysterious message from her missing teacher. Using their detective skills, a pinch of magic and a trickle of technology, the friends stumble into a battle that's been brewing for decades. And what starts as a simple missing-persons case turns into a clash of light versus dark magic. Can Tank and Fizz overcome their fears and track down the missing mages before the black magic makes them disappear for good? The Case of the Missing Mage is the third book in the Tank & Fizz series about two crime-solving monsters living under a mountain, following The Case of the Slime Stampede and The Case of the Battling Bots.
When the Gladiators basketball team's nasty coach finally gets turfed midseason, things couldn't possibly get worse. The team hasn't won a game yet, and morale is at rock bottom. Sameer, who announces the games and keeps score, and Vijay, the team mascot, have their hands full keeping the team's spirits up. When they get promoted to assistant coach and manager, can they help a small, unathletic, Shakespeare-quoting drama teacher coach the team to victory, or at least to dignity? Or will the courtside drama eclipse even the school play?
The prime directive has been changed and four billion robots with atomic blasters are poised to take over the universe. Only Robbie Packford, Earth boy and grade six math nerd, can stop them. But when Robbie drinks the secret formula that is supposed to make him invincible, he turns into a mythical creature from the planet Kerbosky with a disturbing craving for raw meat. Will Robbie reach the nerve center in time to save planet Earth from destruction? And what do four billion not nice robots have to do with the chances of the Vancouver Canucks winning the Stanley Cup anyway?
Keegan and Alex are the only kids in Leamington who haven't volunteered to help out with the town's annual tomato festival. In an attempt to teach them a sense of responsibility, their fathers put them in charge of the tomato toss. The boys decide it's their responsibility to add a little excitement to the event. They exchange the traditional wooden targets for human targets and, before they know it, they are running the most popular event at the fair. The excitement may be too much for the sleepy town and soon the tomato toss is taken to the streets.